Things I have Learned Since Becoming a Mom to Three Boys

10.  Blue toothpaste makes good paint for carpets and, coincidentally, also does a pretty good job of cleaning the carpet when you clean it up.

9.  A tub of Cetaphil lotion will cover 2 small boys, a big screen television, and a dog.  Don't ask why I know this.

8. A Lego will flush down the toilet, but over the next few days it will cause a massive clog that requires removing the toilet to clear.

7. A bag of Cheetos, if squeezed hard enough by a 3 year old, will, indeed 'pop'.  Not only that, but the Cheetos make a pretty impressive plume and scatter over half a grocery store aisle.  Also, everyone else who is shopping will find this MUCH more amusing that the mom does.

6. A baby can unsort 7 baskets of laundry in 1/100th of the time it took mom to sort them in the first place.

5. If you ask your children what they are doing and the three year old responds, "Oh nothing.  You don't need to come up here.", you should run, not walk, up there.

4.  The gel inside a wet diaper can splatter at least 20 feet in every direction when a 5 year old tries to play basketball with an overnight diaper and hits the wall instead of the basket (trash can).

3. Dogs do not really like to be given a bath with toothpaste, deodorant, and Sprite.  They just don't.  And they really don't like the water and soap bath that they need when the toothpaste, deodorant, and Sprite don't work.

2. Deodorant and hard wood or laminate floors are not a good combination.  I found this out the hard way when stepping into the kitchen, unaware that my 3 year old had been 'painting' with deodorant and then wiped it up with a paper towel. That deodorant was VERY slippery.  My backside can attest to that.  Save yourself the hassle of finding out for yourself ;-)

1.  No matter how crazy the days are, no matter how much chaos reigns in the house, no matter how many times you have to stick your hand in the toilet, clean up random personal care items, give someone their third (or fourth) bath of the day, etc, at the end of the day, when your sweet boys all crawl up in your lap, hug and kiss you, and tell you that you are the best mommy in the whole world, it is all worth it.  Every single second. Every single mess.  Every single tear.  One kiss and one I love you will always be worth it.